Fringe and Geekery

A realistic look at practical BDSM lifestyles as they actually play out in India.
The session will address “vanilla” people curious about the realities behind the recent and infamous BDSM books and movie, as well as aspiring “lifestylers” seeking practical insight into how to dabble or plunge into the lifestyle while keeping it sane, safe and consensual.
The speaker will share from her extensive personal experiences, initiate dialogue, break taboos around personal curiosities and desires, and describe how the BDSM community is growing together within the legally foggy and socially judgmental Indian environment.

Outline

My project is about breaking the taboos around the controversial theme of BDSM. The objective is to present a structured conceptual and practical framework around BDSM, and bridge the gaps between ground reality and prevalent fantasy. This session will raise and answer questions around this sensitive and misunderstood subject, drawing upon both personal experience, and the experiences and stories of multiple lifestylers who have kindly permitted me to share their learning.

While discussions such as these are typically rather wide ranging, if they occur at all, the session will touch upon a few key aspects:

• Concept introduction: What BDSM is and isn’t
• Nuances and shades of the lifestyle, from experimenting to living it
• Top v/s bottom, sadist v/s masochist, dominant v/s submissive, master/slave/TPE
• The much misunderstood “switch”
• Polyamory and poly households
• BDSM and sexuality (LGBT), gender patterns, male and female led relationships
• Fantasy and reality in the Indian context
• Ethics and safety

Requirements

An open mind, tolerance, a willingness to ask questions, and a willingness to share. Please leave any judgmental thoughts at the door!

Speaker bio

The speaker is an active BDSM practitioner in India. She has been a lifestyle submissive for over 10 years now and is very vocal about her lifestyle choices. She believes in self–empowerment through empowerment of others; has a wide experience of writing both poetry and prose around themes of feminism, LGBT, sexuality and erotica. She has also been very active in several real-world BDSM communities and has close connections with a wide spectrum of other practitioners both in India and globally.

The speaker is also the author of a series of simplified guides to various aspects of BDSM, which are undergoing the publishing process.