Tips and tricks to practise assertiveness

What are some of the unhelpful beliefs about saying ‘no’?

1. Saying ‘no’ is rude and aggressive.
2. Saying ‘no’ is unkind, uncaring and selfish.
3. Saying ‘no’ will hurt and upset others and make them feel rejected.
4. Fear of not being liked if you say ‘no’.
5. Others’ needs are more important than mine.
6. I should try and please others, and be helpful.

Inability to say ‘no’ results from deep conditioning. People who have difficulty saying ‘no’ usually overestimate the difficulty that the other person will have in accepting the refusal. In reality, when you express your feelings openly and honestly, it liberates you and also gives the other person the freedom to say no to you.